The love, drama, and tragedy of expecting...

I am getting closer and closer to the birth of my third child - another boy - Donald Ray Bailey, junior (collective ughs in my honor happily acknowledged with smug looks directed to my hubby). I love my hubby - I do not love his name. He doesn't either - he's always signed it Don R. Bailey. But hey, we found out we were preggers - he found a sudden NEED to have his name carried on. Ugh.

At first, I planned to call the baby Drake - it would give me a full daytime drama cast - Grayson, Nicholas, and Drake - the Bad Bailey Boys who grow up to be heartbreaking world conglomerate billionaires. Yup, that was the plan. My sister one-upped me and renamed my child Raiden. A name my sons and hubby promptly fell in love with (enough for a nickname only I'm afraid - Don junior will still be on the birth certificate.) For those of you without sons in the birth to 25 age bracket, Raiden is the name of a character from Mortal Kombat. It also mimics my husband's name - backwards - Ray Don. I knew she was listening to too many Alice Cooper vinyls backwards when she suggested this and immediately brought up the hubby name thing.

But - beyond the name drama - and the drama of finding out that I'm going to have YET another boy - the biggest drama in our household (at this moment - they change frequently) is the two older siblings learning to make space for the new baby. Literally. We are a three bedroom house. Who is giving up their privacy to the new sleepless poop machine? The fight is on to decide.

Then there is space in their hearts and tender egos. Oh my. I thought it was bad when Grayson, my oldest, was 3. I now learn that almost 9 year olds and 5 year olds have far more reasoning - and therefore anxiety inducing - skills than 3 year olds can ever hope to claim.

My eldest never wanted the 2nd one. News of an impending third literally sent him into tears. For hours. Then he figured that the new baby will probably annoy #2 as much as #2 annoys him - so he now sees this as his opportunity for vicarious revenge. So, he's neutral.

My 5 year old is worse. Oi. For the first...um... 30 weeks of this pregnancy he showed nothing but absolute thrilldom with the pending baby. Someone to play with, to hug, to kiss, to shower his otherwise (from his older brother) spurned affections on. Yes!! This can only be a good thing!

Suddenly - last night - for no apparent reason I can find other than a Rugrats episode - sorta kinda maybe - he's scared to death. He swears the baby will be cuter than him, that I will forget him, that I will give him away. (Did I mention we have 6 week old kittens??? Anyone???)

The more I attempted to reassure him, the more - and louder- he proclaimed he knew, just knew, I would forget him. As if I could forget his big doe brown eyes, tiny little boy voice, skinny but pinchable butt, dirty feet, and earnest expressions. Never! Finally, in exasperation, at around 1 in the morning, I told him it was absolutely impossible for me to ever forget him because he wouldn't shut up. Yeah, that helped.

The next thing I know, his older brother - either suffering from acute lack of sleep or a sudden affection and love for his little brother - brought in one of the kittens. My 5 year old took the kitten, started petting it, and eventually the tears subsided. It was one of the sweetest moments of my life - to witness this kind and caring change in both brothers.

Heck, I may keep that kitten after all.

Grant Seeker Guidelines

This will be the world's fastest and dirtiest grant advice column ever - and I mean EVER :) Usually these things are packed with ads asking you to send in $29.95 a month for six months.

Looking for a grant? But not quite sure where to start? Well - where you start depends really on where you intend to end up. Why do you want the money? Um, hey - 'because I'm broke and want to pay my mortgage' isn't a good response. Great motivator - but poor response.

There are other questions to consider of course, but basically here's some hard and sure advice - have a solid business plan FIRST - work on that like a college thesis!

Visit http://grants.gov/ and then http://www.fordfound.org/about/guideline.cfm - why? Because both are excellent sources of information.

Also consider: http://fedmoney.com/grants/f0010000.htm and
http://www.sba.gov/expanding/grants.html

Go. Now. Invest a few hours. Or, hire a grant researcher and writer to do it for you. But if you're like most people - time is definitely cheaper than money.

Oh, and never give up. It takes time and effort to earn that $5000.00 or $50000.00 you're looking for - no one is going to hand it to you cause your kids are cute :)

Thanks to my online friends!

Hi all - I just wanted to post a HUGE thank you for those of you who sent my dad those cards. They are printed cards - no computers in the room to check ecards I'm afraid :) But the hospital staff prints them on card stock and delivers them to their room. This morning he called, laughing, and asked me to please thank all of my online friends - he got over 100 of them! He'll be there until this coming Thursday at least (blood sugar problems) so I went up there today and spent some time putting them up around his room - taping them to the walls, the door, the window frame - his room is SO festive and bright now with well wishes. Everyone who came in was simply stunned and had to spend time reading the cards. I just wanted to let you all know what a wonderful thing you did for my dad and how much I really appreciate all of my online friends for helping :)

Hospital almost killed my dad :(

For those of you wondering where the heck I disappeared to after Friday, let me catch you all up. My dad, as you'll know if you read this blog, has been in the hospital since Father's Day because he fell and broke his leg. Here, the saga continues.

My father's regular doctor is in Columbia - some 30 minutes from here, and does not practice in our local hospital. Ok, normally this wouldn't be a big deal, but for some reason the doctors here from Sentinel Health Partners are apparently suffering from God complexes and/or went to medical school via the internet for 3 months before printing out their license.

Without conferring with my dad's doctor (Dr. Smith in Columbia), doctors here from Sentinel Health (not the hospital - that's Kershaw County Medical Center) decided to change his insulin. The man has a broken leg, they decide to screw around with his diabetes. He's normally on 45 units in the morning and 35 in the afternoon of a certain brand (Humulus? or something 70/30)

They not only changed the brand - they decided - with zero knowledge of his medical history - and without conferring with his regular doctor - to change him to a 'sliding scale' which put him at around 8 units a day. HELLO???

So, within a few days the man's sugar spiked up to 296 from his normal 110-140 levels. They were baffled by this. DUH.

Ok, so finally, on Friday, when I went to see him I learned about all this and found out that he'd stopped eating all together and felt terrible. He was also a bit clammy and had developed a large sore on his shoulder. He was also NOT on a diabetic diet through the hospital cafeteria. They said he was - but folks, since when do you serve a meal to a diabetic that consists of ham, rice, stuffing, jello, and mixed fruit??? How many starches is that??

Not only that - but they were using glucose - a sugar - in his IV bag to help with the antibiotics. Uh - this could have been done with saline solution people.

The man was in the hospital for a broken LEG - and they were trying to kill him! So, on Saturday morning when I saw his nurse - I asked her about this. All of this. She responded that he was on a diabetic diet (sorry, I still disagree with that) and that if my dad wanted he could refuse the treatment for his diabetes. So, I went to his house, got his kit, and brought it back. My mom gave him his late afternoon dose of 35 units of his brand of insulin and 45 minutes later his sugar started falling. It was 245 when we left. The next morning it was 183 and this morning (Monday) it was 117.

His Sentinel Health doctors were a tad put out that he'd chosen to ignore his orders and said they were 'relieving themselves of his case' - thank God! I can't imagine he would have survived much longer with sugar levels that high thanks to their 'medical expertise' - even one of his male nurses had the GALL to say my dad's meds wouldn't be as good as those he was instructed to give my dad. When he checked my dad's sugar he was really arrogant about saying 'It's 183' and my dad said "Well, thats far and away better than 296 that it's been all week - get out of my room."

I have to laugh at my dad sometimes. Anyway, so that's why I disappeared this weekend :(

Father's Day - the never ending story

Ok, my dad, who is really quite a mess sometimes, was working on his fifth wheel camper on Father's Day trying to get it ready for a 2 week camping trip. My sister was telling him - in her daughterly fashion 'don't do it that way, do it this way' - and in the end, she was right - because in doing what he was doing (balancing his large behind on the top of a precarious step to reach an awning) he fell, into my poor mother - causing several bruises to her chest area, and shattered his left leg.

Now, this man has already had both his knees replaced, is diabetic, and has a heart condition - so you'd THINK he'd be careful. But no, hard headedness must win out in the end, so he wound up on the ground. My mother and sister couldn't lift his clumsy behind, so they called an ambulance to come the 2 whole miles to their house and take him to the hospital where they confirmed - yes, it's broken.

But because not only was it broken but shattered just above that very expensive knee replacement, he couldn't balance his previously described large butt on crutches, so got to stay in the hospital until they could do surgery. Which, for our podunk hospital, apparently takes a while - today in fact - Friday - almost a week later.

A friend of mine said they probably had to order the parts from Napa. *eyeroll* You know Advanced Auto can overnight those suckers. But then, they'd probably be for the wrong model.

Anyway - so today my dad went in first thing this morning to have his reconstructive surgery. I'm hoping he doesn't come out with a Cindy Crawford-esque left leg, but who knows. It can only be an improvement over those wobbly scarred clumsy things he has now.

My mom called my sister - the one who is so happy she was right that she's ignoring the fact that the man is in pain - to tell her that he came through surgery ok. So my sister called me to relay the news and let me know, again, that she was right. It fell to me to then call some of his relatives to let them know. But heck, I don't know all their phone numbers and one brother hasn't been home in over a week from camping on the river so....

Lord this is a Southern family. Anyway, Father's Day here is still ongoing cause Father is still in the hospital from his Fathers Day Fiasco :) You can send him a get well soon card here: http://www.kcmc.org/cards/ - his name is Frank Tidwell.

Crazy ebay mom

Ok, a friend sent this to some lists we're both on and I spent a half hour (when I should have been working) in morbid fascination. You probably would too.

http://www.auctions-registration.com/ebay/

This woman needs serious help and a yard sale :)

Raiden

I'm not exactly sure why or how, but my sister has renamed my baby. Oh, he'll still be Donald Ray Bailey, junior - but whereas I had planned the name Drake, my sister came up with Raiden (Ray Don - backwards, but pronounced Rayden). Raiden was also a character in Mortal Kombat - a film both my sons and my husband LOVE so Raiden he has become. Now spelling wise I'm not sure if we're going with Rayden to keep more with the actual name, or Raiden to keep with the actual character. Probably Rayden - I just like the way it looks. The boys actually whooped with glee when they heard the name so it's all voted. They couldn't agree between Drake and Dj, so Rayden is a happy compromise. I sortof like it too - it's a good name to go with Grayson & Nicholas - so now we'll have Grayson, Nicholas, and Rayden. I'm a little afraid people will call him Ray (a name I was trying to avoid) but all in all, I like the name. I think I've decided to spell it Rayden too - seeing it written, I like it better.

It's a boy!

Yup - it's a boy. Donald Ray Bailey, junior, will make his appearance sometime in mid-August. Anyone wishing to donate to the diaper fund can click here for our registry or donate via paypal by clicking here.

He's a very active baby already - I don't even have to worry about kick counts because he let's me know in no uncertain terms that he's there. He'll go by the name Drake (D for Donald, Ray for Ray, Drake cause I liked it better than Dray!)

My sister is having a shower for me in late July - close to my own birthday actually - which falls on July 22. My eldest son's birthday is July 29 - so this is going to be a major party household come late summer!

This will give me 3 boys - and my parents 5 grandsons - nary a girl in the bunch :) I've threatened to dress him in pink for the first few years anyway but my hubby won't hear of it. This is the same man afraid to be in the delivery room with me. *eyeroll*

I'll be having another C-section - my third. Odd to know I'll have delivered 3 children and never have been in labor. Weirder still to know that at 33 I'm having my 3rd baby boy :) Right after seeing Star Wars III. This must be the year of the 3.

I'll post pics as I get them ;)

Danielle

Star Wars and such

Well, I saw SWIII when it first came out and have been waiting to find the dvd's of the old ones - you know, 4, 5, & 6. I finally got them through my netflix membership (love that place by the way) and have been watching them over the past few nights.

If you've seen SWIII - or want to - then I really recommend that you go back and watch those older episodes - you're going to be amazed at how much detail comes through in SWIII.

These are the things normal movie reviewers don't mention. Why the heck I notice them I dont know except hey, Im a pregnant mom of 2 avid star wars fans and the details are important. I cried through SWIII and after waiting 20 or so years to watch the others - again - I cried again. Watching Darth Vader struggle with the choice of saving his son's life versus turning against Darth Sid is way more potent when you've seen Darth as a 9 year old slave turned Jedi who marries a queen and 'dies' to save her. He lost Padme because of the dark side - would he lose his only link to her? Luke? Well, as we all know - nope, he chose his son and redeemed himself for both Luke, Leia, and ultimately Padme. Wow - how cool is that? Ya just didnt see all that the first time around 20 years ago.

At the very end of Return of the Jedi (now known as part VI) there's a touching scene where Obi Wan, Yoda, and Anakin are all standing and beaming proudly at Luke. That's where I *really* cried. Because folks, somebody did their homework - this guy from 20 years ago looks *exactly* like Anakin does just before his fall in part III. Same golden curls, blue eyes, and wicked grin. The makeup artist must have studied this 5 nanosecond scene for months. Kudos to whoever they were.

That's not the only homework that was done - Bobba Fett has apparently kept his daddy's old ship from Part II because it's the same ship that carts Han Solo off to Jabba the Hut. In the scenes of celebration (when the Emperor is killed and the Republic is apparently born again) many planet cities are shown celebrating with fireworks - I'd swear Naboo and Coruscant were all taken directly from these celebration scenes. Wow. Pardon my spelling on planet names btw.

Now, don't get me wrong - there are a few spots where things just don't quite make sense. For example between episode 2 and 3, Luke has apparently done some mega Jedi learning - yet it hasn't been that long (they're still trying to rescue Han after all) and apparently he didn't get this knowledge from Yoda cause when he finally does keep his promise and return to Yoda, Yoda dies. Or morphs. Whatever 900 year old green Jedi's do. So where did he learn all this amazing kick butt stuff in what is apparently a matter of weeks?

We know now - after seeing episode III, that C3PO's memory was wiped - but what the heck happened to everyone else? Luke asks Leia if she remembers her mother - um, she shouldn't - but says she does. And how is she a Princess? I thought the man who adopted her was a senate member of some sort - was he royalty and I missed it? I'm so confused :) Their real mother was a Queen, but it seemed she was an elected Queen - so ya wouldn't think the title of Princess would carry over. Odd things :)

Oh well, this has gone on long enough. See episode III, then immediately see 4, 5, and 6 - cry. Its a perfect Father's Day occupation. Hey - if you see III this weekend, you can get a free poster - http://www.starwars.com/episode-iii/release/theater/news20050615.html

Danielle

Today - monster day

You ever have one of those days when you'd just LOVE to crawl back into bed? Well, I'd love to have a day thats NOT one of those. Every day has been that way!

Im having loads of trouble sleeping now with the baby and all (30 weeks along!) so in the mornings I have the worst time trying to force my aching bod out of bed. My pelvis is out of alignment so it's painful too :( and walking?? Oi.

Anyhoo, today I finally got out of bed around 10 am or so and then my dad comes over, bringing my nephews, who - by the way - destroy my house. Like it's not bad enough. They also fight, run around, get into trouble, drive me nuts, and ya know - my own kids do that enough. So, I'm *tired*

Dad wants us to go to lunch so I said ok, but I don't want burgers so I said he had to go to a place I wanted. He let me drive his massive brand new Ford 350 Lariat (oh cool) and we had souvlaki chicken and rice at the Lugoff House of Pizza. Yummers - we split the plate cause it was SO much food.

After that, we went to the car wash (got to drive again!!) where I spent $10 in quarters washing this massive truck. Oi, the exercise I didnt really need. Or maybe I did. Other than being extremely hot, I actually feel looser now than before.

We came back here and I printed out some photos for him of the motorhome in the river and then they left an hour or so later. I'm totally worn out now but my house is a wreck and I've gotten NOTHING done work wise. UGH!!!!! I've got to figure out how to do this better!!

My week

Well, what a chaotic week. I've been busy with preparing for the baby, running to doctor's appointments, and doing presentations hoping to gain a new contract.

You know how some people 'nest' when preggers? I'm apparently going through that now. Tons of laundry and I actually have found satisfaction in doing dishes. Have I *lost* my mind?? I must have!! My house is slowly but surely getting spring cleaned and I'm trying to figure out where in this tiny house I'm going to put a whole new baby wardrobe. No clue :)

I have another doctor's appointment on Friday the 10th - I get to see another ultrasound and hopefully this time we'll know if it's a boy or girl. We're rooting for a girl here since Don is still stuck on Donald Ray Bailey, jr. Ok, YIKES. But if it's a boy I suppose I'll go through with that name. He is a great dad and deserves it. Though I'm not sure the poor kid does.

I've been working very hard on a proposal the last two weeks hoping to gain the contract to build the website for Kershaw County Chamber of Commerce. Wish me luck! My business has been very successful nationally, but I really want more local exposure and this would do it. I also agreed to sponsor their next business after hours event - do they even know how shy I am?? I'll let you know how both go soon :)

Today we went on a picnic with my dad - we ate in the truck cause there was a thunderstorm. Anyway, the interesting part was at the river a huge motorhome had backed into the river down a boat ramp trying to pull a boat up the ramp. This was hilarious in a way and scary in another. I was so afraid the men trying to swim under the motor home to attach cables to pull it out were going to get trapped! I took pics with a disposable camera that we purchased there and will show those off soon too :)

I have tons of work to get done and its already past midnight, so goodnight :) Ill post more soon!

Danielle